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At times some women resist my message so much. Shirley was one of them. And at times those women return months or years later and apologize. And Shirley was one of them…as well. In November, she wrote me this: My best guy friend and I started dating at the beginning of the summer. It was all havee idea and I kind of just went along with it.
He was a lazy dater, and I held my ground until he courted me. Eventually, everything changed, and he was talking about commitment and insisting he was my boyfriend, and spending all his time with me and just so happy to have me in his life.
But I took it for granted. All the while refusing to call myself his girlfriend, because of some dumb Rori Raye shit I learned… I think he got tired of me treating him like he was obligated like a boyfriend, but me keeping one foot out arye door. Our fights would escalate really fast because of my emotional instability, but we really liked each other and loved each other already from being best friends and going through so much together and the sex was awesome, of course. However, weeks ago, I threw a fit about him ahve time with his friends instead of me.
It was ridiculous of me, because we had just spent several days in a row together, but it made me so insecure. I forgot the wisdom about men needing time alone after cycles of intimacy. I kept nagging him about every little thing he said and how he said it.
This after him showing increasingly serious signs of being fori into me. None of my friends could believe it. But I can believe it — I scared him off. We are still in touch and very loving and friendly to each other. He started as an EUM but holding my ground turned him into a prince. Then holding my ground when it was time to let down my guard turned him relationshop into a frog. He was pursuing me hardcore and showering me with affection until that fight. He still wants to hang out, he still recognizes that I am an amazing woman in life, and I get the sense the door is still open in many ways.
I get so anxious and insecure… I need help taking my power back. I feel so anxious now that we are rorl up, but I felt anxious all the time when Tori was with him, too! So I know this is on me. I feel so foolish for scaring him off so bad.
He was really into me. Do you think your eBook is a good fit for me? Or is this hzve too weird? Thanks for taking the time to read this and answer relationsjip. I appreciate the way you put yourself out there to help others, even if it does start a war online sometimes and bring out the sassiness in all of us. Shirley has since read my ebook and signed up for my Journey Inward group coaching. I was feeling anxious for nothing. Of course, he called me the instant i had sincerely forgotten completely about him and wanting to hear from him.
I was so focused on meeting my girl hwve and going on a super fun shopping trip, that I forgot he even existed. I applaud her sober view on sex that resonates with me more than any other coach I know. And her concept of circular dating has been a practice of mine even before I found her though her circular dating is not all about dating per se. Shirley here is just one frse such casualties that they suspected.
Rori Raye talks a lot about feeling messages. Related to above, my method lies heavily on inner work, on figuring out why we think, feel and act the way we do and work to change that to the better.
For them being authentic is about airing their grievances whenever they want it, uncaring about how that might come across to the other person and how that can push him away. Inner work grounds you and as such you become so much less reactive in the face of things that used to upset you so much. This is the secret why my method works like a charm. Leaning back is the answer to attracting masculine guys. When leaning back is a way of being, a woman is very irresistible on that virtue alone.
The reason why my method works is also because I cut though the roots of our anxiety: And expectations come from the yearning inside of us for validation or feeling fullness. Once my clients do the work that allows them to be full within without a dependence of any external factor and surrender to acceptance of what is, they become a transformed person overnight. And their men and relationships are transformed too as the result. FM work in moderation. In relationship, leading with fear and agenda rarely works.
It feels masculine, pushy and controlling to a man as well. This is why my method is so feminine-energy based. As I always say your energy will define the kind of relationship you have, whether it will deepen or flounder.
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Our fear of abandonment is irrational and probably stems from childhood wounds. The good news is it can be cured.
And my brand new program Four Components Of Melting His Heart teaches you how to polarize your relationship raue and split-proof it. When you are a secure woman, you smell bad apples from a mile away. It takes one to know one. And as I always say you attract and are attracted to men on the same level of your woundedness. But my EUM helped me heal myself from my own emotional unavailability. He is the reason why I am here, among other people. That kind of unwavering confidence and inner strength is why you are so irresistible.
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No man can help falling relatiobship deeply in love with a woman like that. My method in the end, as many women have attested, is so much easier and simpler. Do less to get more. Focus on and encourage the positives and see them grow. No strategy, no gimmick. It cree takes the removal of expectations, reactiveness and jadedness. Attachment to outcome makes you very anxious.
It takes, counterintuitively, the softening of your boundaries.
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My method requires questioning and challenging your boundaries before trusting them. When one is ready the teacher will reoationship. I hope you are ready for my message and if you are you can start here. Image credit Deposit Photo! My man broke up with me again after another fight, this has happened a few times now in our 2 year relationship.
Our last fight was 2 weeks ago when I accused him of something going on with his mates widow. They have been friends a long time. At first I thought he was wonderful to show support to her but after 10 months of putting her first and me feeling like thhe option it hurts. Maybe I am being harsh and I do realize this lady is going through a very difficult time. He started to lie to me about spending time with her because I would get upset and jealous.
The first year we were together was wonderful but since his mate died he has pushed me away quite a few times and I get angry and upset with him. This is the only problem that we have had and when I react he just says this is to hard and we break up. We always seem to get back together after a few weeks and carry on without really wanf the issue. It feels like we keep going in cycles.
He took me away to meet all his family a couple of months ago and I felt like he is serious about this havr. We are talking as friends now and did hook up the other night. We have a very strong sexual chemistry. Now I feel like that is all we have although I love him and want to work things out. Like you say in your book talking about the relationship is not something I should do and I know whenever I have before we end up in an argument.
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He did say after our last fight that we will never get back together but I have heard that before. He said we can be friends but then we had sex the other night. He is so angry with me for acussing him. The thing is she is not going to disappear so I will have to try and accept that she will always be his friend. I love him and want to be with him as we do have an awesome time when we are together and many wonderful memories together.
I would really appreciate some advice from you please. I just want to make things right.